When it comes to ADHD and autism, conversations in society often focus on causes. People search for something or someone to blame — a medication, parenting style, diet, or lifestyle factor. The underlying message can feel like: “This shouldn’t exist.”
But as a therapist who is also neurodivergent, I see the reality every day: being neurodivergent has always existed. What causes the most harm is not ADHD or autism itself, but the shame, stigma, and misunderstanding that surrounds it.
What Being Neurodivergent Really Means
Being neurodivergent isn’t about being broken or in need of fixing. It’s simply a different way of experiencing and processing the world. ADHD, autism, dyslexia, dyspraxia, and other forms of neurodivergence are part of natural human diversity.
When we focus on searching for a “cause,” we send a harmful message: that someone’s existence is a mistake. This overlooks the truth — that neurodivergent people bring valuable perspectives, creativity, and resilience, but often struggle in environments that aren’t designed for them.
The Real Challenge: Living in a World That Isn’t Designed for Us
For many neurodivergent people, the greatest struggle is not their traits — it’s trying to exist in a world that doesn’t understand or accommodate them.
Bright lights, noise, and sensory overwhelm can turn everyday environments into barriers.
Rigid school or workplace systems often fail to account for ADHD focus patterns, masking, or autistic burnout.
Stigma and stereotypes create shame that pushes people to hide who they are.
It isn’t ADHD or autism that breaks people down — it’s the lack of acceptance and appropriate support.
Shifting the Conversation
Instead of asking: “What caused this?” we should be asking:
How can we build environments that embrace differences?
How can we reduce the shame that so many autistic and ADHD people carry?
How can we create supports that help people thrive, not just survive?
As a therapist, I know that the right supports — whether that’s sensory adjustments, flexible routines, or compassionate understanding — can transform someone’s quality of life. This is the heart of neurodiversity-affirming practice.
Moving Forward: From Blame to Belonging
If we move away from searching for causes and focus instead on inclusion, compassion, and practical strategies, we create a world where neurodivergent people can thrive.
Because the real question is not why we exist — the real question is how we can belong.
